Divorce is tough. Emotions run high, stress rises and it always feels like there’s a thousand things to do at once. For better or worse, somebody has to move and the best way to deal with that it to be pragmatic.
No matter the reasons or motives behind a separation, one thing remain clear: you both have an attainable goal that can only be reached by cooperation and compromise. Nowhere is this clearer than when children are affected by the move.
Whether to solve the problem or for dramatic effect, some people choose to leave quickly, avoiding the proper legal arrangements that come with moving out of a marital home. While it might seem like a good option in the moment, we cannot stress how important it is not to make rash decisions.
If you are a parent and are seen to abandon the household, that move may come back to haunt you when it comes to custody rights. Furthermore, you might leave vital documents behind that prove certain legal ownerships in a court of law. Most importantly, leaving suddenly will impact the children’s wellbeing. Change must be eased into gently so that your kids grow accustomed to things, and recognise separation to be an adult and rational process.
A novel way to deal with divorced living is an arrangement called ‘bird nesting’. This means you and your spouse rent a cheap flat nearby and live there for alternate weeks, always looking over the children.
Bird nesting equality and order during the divorce process; each of you have the exact same living standard, except you’re out of each other’s hair, in touch with the children and permitted that bit of breathing space we so need in times of separation. It’s a good domestic decision and financially viable, as neither of you are buying or renting outright. Furthermore, the children stay rooted in familiar territory during the divorce process, then grow accustomed to either parent leaving for short amounts of time.